The Groom's a Fag; The Bride's a Cunt; The Best Man's a Whore; and the Maiden of Honor (Just) Hung Herself in the Closet
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The Groom’s a Fag; The Bride’s a Cunt; The Best Man’s a Whore; and the Maiden of Honor (Just) Hung Herself in the Closet

On the Rocks

Venue

The Beard Cave at St. Mary’s Church
3916 Locust Walk
Philadelphia, PA 19104 United States
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Daniel is pretty gay, but he’s marrying Nora. Nora is a virgin that wants her wedding night to be a sexual awakening. Shit gets fucked up. A song, a dance, an image, a poem all wrapped in a sloppy burrito of a play about glamping, hookers, the Easter Bunny, cocaine, Emma Stone, hauntings, and the horrors of commitment.

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On The Rocks is the collaborative works of director-producer Elaina Di Monaco and playwright-producer Haygen Brice Walker. Elaina was the girl that sat in the front row Freshman year and talked non-stop. Haygen-Brice was the guy who sat in the back and cynically judged Elaina for talking so much. Elaina knows Brandy Norwood as Cinderella; Haygen-Brice knows her as Moesha. We are ambitious queer millennial disasters and there’s an audience for that. Haygen Brice mostly writes and Elaina mostly directs, but the best idea always wins. We make theater-ish experiences that don’t force people to sit silently in a dark room for two hours. Our work is bold, messy, fucked up, unapologetic, queer, stupid, progressive, millennial, and has recently included a lot of fake blood (that might be a phase). We create live, moving theatrical performance. The audience often has to move through the space and it’s always BYOB. If they can sit without squirming, we think that speaks more to their character than to our work.

We never want our audience to settle in or get too comfortable. That’s not why people go to the theatre. I mean, hell . . . most people DON’T go to the theater anymore. We’re trying to change that. We want the booty poppin’, margarita drinkin’, Netflix lovin’ generation to GTFO of the house and see some live performance, so we’re making something just for them. Our audience wants risk, new ideas, foul language, a challenge, hashtags, sex, gore and surprise. We make them sign a waiver to enter the space and that allows us to do pretty much anything we want. We believe in silly, raunchy, shocking work that asks tough questions in unique ways. Our work evokes gasps, cackles, eye rolls, and “oh hell no’s!” Then you can talk shit about it later. We want our reviews to be incredible or awful—never mediocre. If you see something we make, you’ll either love it or hate it. Either way, you’ll have a memorable experience.

Website

$20/ 130 Minutes