Get to know pillardance—Courtney Colon writes in with this collective response, and threatens my mom.

Name: pillardance company.

Age: Collectively? 132 years young. Roughly.

Where do you live now? South Jersey.

What’s your show title?
He Was Either Well and Over It, Or Lost and Gone Forever.

What was the first thing you stole?
Fruit Stripe gum . . . you know, the one with the zebra? Most satisfying commandment breakage EVER.

What’s your favorite alcoholic beverage?
We prefer the hard stuff-anything that leads to violent dance fights on the streets of Philly in the wee hours of the morning.

What was the last performance you saw?
Fellow dance companies at WAXworks in Brooklyn.

If you were a “Founding Father,” which one would you be?
Ben Franklin, because who doesn’t like Ben? He looks like Santa Claus.

Do you care about the Civil War Sesquicentennial?
We’re not smart enough for this question.

What’s the worst thing you ever did for money?
Well, one of our members was paid to lie in a bathtub and get cake batter poured on them. Swear to god, that is a true story.

Who’s your favorite Phillies player?
We’re hockey and football fans in this family.

Do you own a gun?
We don’t own guns, but if we did, we would fire them at your mom. [I feel that there have been a surprising number of mom jokes this year . . . –NG]

Do you have pets?
The big-ass blonde dog is named Dr. Rocks-O, and the best cat in the world has many names, including Mr. Pidders and Reginald Fuzzybottom the Third. His Christian name is Bruce, though.

How do you earn your keep?
We all work in retail, also known as the seventh rung of hell.

That’s what you get for making fun of people’s moms! He Was Either Well and Over It, Or Lost and Gone Forever. runs during the 2011 Philly Fringe on September 8 and 15 at the Painted Bride Art Center, 230 Vine Street, Old City. 9:00 pm each night, $10.

–Nicholas Gilewicz